Feeling a little bewildered/confused by some of the political stuff going on within the world of HE, both at national and local level. It seems obvious that as a minority group we would want to band together and work as a group, but of course its never that simple. And although we could be seen as a 'group', HE contains such diverse ideas, outlooks and approaches, so its never going to be a totally cohesive body. I don't think this is a bad thing in itself, but it becomes very messy and complicated when representation of this 'group' is needed.
To be honest, what is bothering me the most is the fact that I don't feel like I know what's going on, or where I stand. I suppose I am still fairly new to it all, and don't have a strong background rooting me in my own view on HE - I'm still taking it all in and discovering how we are going to do it, it changes frequently. But I do feel kind of out of the loop, or maybe a bit thick, for not being more tuned-in to what is happening. I read a lot, so on one level I see the discussions going on, but there seems to be so many different agendas.
I used to be very politically aware, and have definite views and strong opinions, but I'm finding that the older I get the more cynical and pessimistic I'm getting about politics. I don't see this as a particularly good thing, as it leads to a sort of lethargic 'whats the point?' attitude, which the younger me would have despised.
There is a part of of me that thinks all the conflict and debate over HE is too much/too big for me to deal with, I struggle enough trying to do the right thing in my own little world of HE. But I also see how the bigger picture is so vitally linked to my smaller one, and to some degree I'm dependent on the support there. Then I feel I should be more actively involved, its my duty to contribute in some way (not sure how).
I'm not going to reach any conclusions here, and I don't know if this will make any sense or be of any interest to anyone else, it just where my head is this groggy Sunday. I just wanted to try to get it down in words as sometimes that helps me work through things.
I'll go back to the nice, light postings of my wonderful world with A soon, as that world is still very much in existence.